doing nothing ~ The Joy Diet

I'm reading The Joy Diet by Martha Beck, along with dozens of other people in a group read led by Jamie Ridler, life coach extraordinaire. Martha prepares the reader for some difficulty with this first ingredient ~ doing nothing. I thought it wouldn't be all that difficult for me to practice sitting in silence for 15 minutes each day but it wasn't all that easy either.

I passed through phases of indifference, guilt, rationalizing, and denial about making space for me. Self-care is essential to me and I do have a plan that I have committed to and practice daily. Including doing nothing in the plan took some adjustments. Early in the week I kept telling myself that I didn't have to practice it every day, that a couple of times to start would suffice. Baby steps. That in turn led to "how can I do this when there is so much else to get done?" The guilt thing regarding lack of productivity. After the guilt thing I began to tell myself that taking 15 minutes a day really wouldn't have that great of an impact on my well-being, that producing something, anything, was higher on my list than my "nothing" time for myself. I keep a list of things to do for the day and work my way through it. If I finish everything on the list then I have a tendency to pat myself on the back and add more things to the list. Stopping at the original count isn't enough. I have extra time so I'd better get more done. That self-talk crept into my head day after day. So...I ended with denial. Denial is creepy. I just don't like when it sits on my shoulder and talks to me, convincing me that I don't need something which in the long run will serve a greater good than the old habits.

I put it all away after 4 days of these various conversations in my head and decided to take Martha at her word. If I put up the No Vacancy sign, vacate my body and mind and learn to re-visit that place on a regular basis, I will slowly "become aware of an underlying calm that is always present within me, even when my thoughts and emotions are in an uproar."

How great is that? Why not opt for moods and worries "moving through" rather than sticking around to dominate my life?" Ho ho. Martha is on to something here. I actually began clearing the path for the practice early in the week, and by mid-week, had talked myself into "hey, this is good, I can do this!"

The most difficult part for me, once I arrived at the "this is good" part, was turning off the words and thoughts which travel on the freeway through my mind, speeding through non-stop, passing by any exit ramp. I had to practice practice practice taking an off-ramp and pulling over to a rest area. Once I made it as a driving exercise, it became easier for me to "turn off" the road and have a nice little wayside picnic. Whatever works, do it. I came to realize that a daily dose of nothing would eventually lead to slower, winding, more scenic roads to travel in my own mind and finally to more like drifting in a canoe on a small, calm lake. I set that as my goal. Get off the freeway and into a boat on the water and just drift. Sure, there will be windy days on that lake, making for some choppy waters, but better some white caps here and there than the high-speed chase on the information super highway running between my ears.

My vision card for doing nothing. When I am calming my mind the color that almost always shows up is blue. Candles are a part of this card because they lend soft light and subtle fragrance. I often associate calm with blue skies and fluffy clouds, and of course, water is a huge part of my big picture. Be like water. Flow like water. It always always finds it's course, whether it is around, under, over, or through. Sometimes it is wild, and some of the time it is calm and lends serenity. The balance for me is somewhere between that calm lake and the smooth flow over the fall. The Chinese characters are the symbol for water.

I'm able to sit and do nothing. That's the easy peasy part. It isn't so easy for me to sit and think nothing.

This is only the beginning of what I suspect will be a wonderful and joyful journey. Next item on the menu ~ Truth. Mmmm, delicious truth. Bon appetite!

To sit at the table for this wondrous meal just visit The Next Chapter.